Seeing What Others See and What You May Be Missing

Many poor decisions are not caused by a lack of intelligence.

They are caused by a narrow frame.

A person may see one part of the situation very clearly, but miss another part (for various reasons including that it was something that they didn’t want to hear) that matters just as much.

That is why perspective-taking is such an important meta-skill.

Perspective-taking is the ability to step outside your own view long enough to thoughtfully and objectively consider what else may be true.

It does not mean giving up your judgment.

It does not mean assuming everyone else is right.

It does not mean trying to please everyone.

It means recognizing that even when your view is thoughtful, informed, and well-intended, it may still be incomplete.

That distinction matters because pressure tends to narrow the frame.

When something feels urgent, personal, frustrating, or high-stakes, most people naturally focus on the part of the situation closest to them.

We focus on the problem we feel most strongly.

We focus on the consequence that affects us most directly.

We focus on the part of the story that confirms what we already believe.

And in those moments, our first interpretation can feel like the whole truth. We emerge feeling certain that we are correct.

But often, it is only part of the truth.

Perspective-taking helps us pause long enough to widen the view, "expand the frame," before we act.

It helps us ask better questions:

• What am I not seeing?

• How might someone else experience this differently?

• What assumptions am I making?

• Am I resisting another explanation because I don’t like it?

• Who has information I don’t have?

• What might this look like from another position?

These questions do not slow good decision-making down.

They usually improve it.

Because once we see more of the situation, we are less likely to solve the wrong problem, overreact to incomplete information, or make a decision that creates a new problem somewhere else.

The Process Change That Looked Obvious

A senior leader wanted to remove a step from an internal approval process.

From his point of view, the step was slowing everyone down. People complained about it often.

It seemed unnecessary, outdated, and bureaucratic.

The decision appeared simple.

Remove the step and improve speed.

And to be fair, there was some truth in that view. The process was too slow. It did create frustration. It did need to be improved.

But before making the change, the leader asked a few different teams how they experienced the process.

Sales said the step slowed down proposals.

Operations said it created unnecessary delays.

But client service saw it differently.

They explained that the same step often caught mistakes before they reached the customer.

That changed the conversation.

The step was not only a delay. It was also a quality check.

So instead of removing it entirely, the team redesigned it. They made it faster, simpler, and less frustrating, while still preserving the protection it provided.

The leader did not abandon his original concern. He widened the frame.

That made the decision better.

Short-term value:

The leader avoided solving one problem while creating another.

Long-term impact:

The organization learned to make decisions with more complete information. Over time, that reduces unintended consequences and improves the quality of decision-making.

The Executive Who Sees the Impact of Her Pace

An executive moves quickly in meetings.

She values efficiency. She likes to keep conversations focused. She believes she is helping the team make progress.

And in many ways, she is.

But she receives feedback that people sometimes stop contributing when she is in the room.

At first, this surprises her.

She does not see herself as intimidating. She does not believe she is shutting people down. From her perspective, she is simply trying to help the group stay focused and make decisions.

But instead of dismissing the feedback, she considers how others may experience her pace.

She begins to see something she had not fully seen before.

When she moves quickly, some people assume her mind is already made up.

Others hesitate to raise concerns because they do not want to slow her down.

Some team members hold back because they are still thinking, while she has already moved on.

Her intention was efficiency.

But the impact was silence.

Once she sees that, she makes a small but important adjustment.

Before moving to a decision, she pauses and asks:

“What are we not considering yet?”

That one question changes the room.

People begin offering concerns earlier. More information enters the conversation. The team becomes more honest, not because the executive became less decisive, but because she became more aware of how her leadership was being experienced.

Short-term value:

More information enters the conversation before decisions are made.

Long-term impact:

The team becomes more engaged and more honest. The executive’s decisions improve because people bring her important information earlier.

Why This Matters

Perspective-taking does not weaken leadership.

It strengthens judgment.

It helps us see more of the situation before we act.

That matters because many decisions look obvious from one angle and very different from another.

• The process step that looks unnecessary to one team may be protecting the customer.

• The executive’s efficiency may be experienced by others as pressure.

• The employee’s resistance may actually be concern.

• The colleague who seems difficult may be seeing a risk no one else has noticed yet.

This does not mean every perspective is equally accurate.

It does not mean every objection should change the decision.

It means the quality of our decisions is limited by the narrowness of our frame.

The leader who can widen the frame is less likely to be trapped by their first interpretation.

They are more likely to hear the information others are carrying.

They are more likely to see consequences before they become problems.

They are more likely to respond with clarity instead of simply reacting from pressure.

And over time, that becomes a real advantage.

Because better questions lead to better understanding.

Better understanding leads to better decisions.

And better decisions create better outcomes.